It feels like I am flying, I lift my arms in the air in an expression of freedom, I feel so good in my body and mind right now. The wind blows softly through my hair, the sun is setting slowly and gives me this warm glow. I look into the face of my radiant, happy little girl while she looks up at her mom making all sorts of funny moves on the trampoline.
I am so happy I made this choice this morning.
When I woke up I noticed I felt sad. I have never been great with change (you might think, really?! yes, really!), and the prospect of leaving South Africa, the place that feels like home to me, moving on to what I know will be an amazing experience but completely new and unknown leaves me feeling melancholic and sad. I felt it coming yesterday as I got very tired very quickly in the afternoon without any clear reason… well today I realized why. I sat with it a little while, feeling myself and I realized I had 2 choices. I could choose to go on a game drive like I wanted too, which would give immediate gratification of the daily elephant fix that I have gotten used to in the last week, but which would add to the ‘problem’ and add to the feeling of sadness and stress. Or I could choose to change the energy and allow myself to get back in alignment by engaging in deep rest and/or deep play.
I chose alignment over immediate gratification, and asked myself what would be deeply restful and/or deeply playful for me today?
Many of you know I have many teachers and two of them underline the aspects of being aware of the 3 aspects of experience: being, doing and having/enjoying. So every morning I ask myself who I desire to be, what I desire to enjoy and do today and I integrate that into my intention. Today I specified that question specifically to what would be deeply restful and/or playful. And the answers were: I really required a long afternoon nap after lunch (‘being’ the one who chooses to nap), I needed a long shower and a coconut oil body rub (enjoying), and I required to play with Emily and jump on the trampoline, trying all sorts of funny moves, and maybe go on the swings as well (doing). And I went into these activities as if there was nothing else in the world, as if I was dancing and nobody was watching.
You might think these are just little things, isn’t that silly or futile? – how can these things bring an unbalanced mind back into alignment?! Well, I don’t know the science behind it, but do not underestimate the power of simple and sober actions! And let me tell you, by creating this conscious deep rest and deep play today and by opening up to what was available for me in those small shifts through presence and surrender I was able to completely shift my energy from being sad and out of whack to feeling aligned, alive and free, and fully ready to make the shift to the new adventure and the intensive travel days ahead of us… And I am happy and grateful for being aware that I have the freedom to choose.
Petra